What Makes A Mother

 What Makes a Mother

I thought of you and closed my eyes.
And prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a mother and
I know I heard him say,

A mother has a baby.
This we know is true.
But God, can you be a mother
when your baby's not with you?

Yes, you can, He replied
with confidence in His voice.
I give many women babies.
When they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime
and others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb
but there's no need to stay.

I just don't understand this. God,
I want my baby here.
He took a breath and cleared His throat
and then I saw a tear.

I wish I could show you
what your child is doing today.
If you could see your child smile
with other children and say,

"We go to earth to learn our lessons
of life and love and fear.
My Mommy loved me, Oh so much,
I got to come straight here.

I feel so lucky to have a Mom
who had so much love for me,
I learned my lesson very quickly.
My Mommy set me free.

I miss my Mommy, Oh so much,
but I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep,
on her pillow's where I lay.

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek
and whisper in her ear,
'Mommy don't be sad today,
I'm your baby and I'm here.'"

So you see, my dear sweet one,
your children are okay.
Your babies are here in MY home
and this is where they'll stay.

They'll wait for you with ME
until your lesson is through.
And on the day that you come home,
they'll be at the gates for you.

So now you see what makes a Mother—
It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of,
right from the very start.

Though some on earth may not realize you are a Mother,
until their time is done.
They'll be up here with ME one day,
and know you're the best one.
~Jennifer Wasik~

Dear Diary - 18th Jan 2013

I’m getting disillusioned with work and I continually wonder if I will ever enjoy or be able to cope with working for an employer for long without self-combusting.

In my current job which I have only been in for about 6 weeks, my colleagues annoy the shit out of me already for the most inconsequential reasons. And I know I am the problem. Will I ever care for work enough to want to do a brilliant job? Is it a phase most people go through? Will I finally make the 110% push towards operating my own business and not just as a side hustle?

Unfortunately, owning an HR consultancy just doesn’t thrill me. I actually wish I could live a life of leisure, look after my (future) kids, do the school run, supervise the housekeeping, have lunch with friends, cook fancy recipes for the family etc and still have money in the bank! And on the side I’d like to sell sex-toys! Yes I really do!

I’m just very tired with my life as it is now, I can’t keep myself from nodding off when I think about the current state of it.

Let’s see what 2013 holds

Why bother watching horror movies

If you crave some horror for a few minutes, switch to BBC or any other international news tv channel during their 'Africa Hour' or whatever they call it fronted by the token broadcaster of African descent they have on their payroll (some people may be offended by this but hey); or of just their 'regular news' about a nanny stabbing the children in her keep, or a father jumping of a high rise balcony clutching his kids, or a mobster blasting off the brains of a rival in broad daylight .....

For the life of me I don't know why anyone will choose to sit through close to 2 hours of a gory horror flick. Don't we have enough right on our doorsteps and on the news? Give me a nonsensical romantic comedy any day, a nice escape from dreary reality. Thank You!

Over dosing on Quotes on Marriages & Relationships ……………………

“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” 
― Friedrich Nietzsche

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.” 
― Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

“If he’s not calling you, it’s because you are not on his mind. If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn’t follow through on little things, he will do same for big things. Be aware of this and realize that he’s okay with disappointing you. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t do what they say they’re going to do. If he’s choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight, then he doesn’t respect your feelings and needs. “Busy” is another word for “asshole.” “Asshole” is another word for the guy you’re dating. You deserve a fcking phone call.” 
― Greg Behrendt

“You know it's never fifty-fifty in a marriage. It's always seventy-thirty, or sixty-forty. Someone falls in love first. Someone puts someone else up on a pedestal. Someone works very hard to keep things rolling smoothly; someone else sails along for the ride.” 
― Jodi Picoult, Mercy

“Let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.” 
― Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

“Love, is a temporary insanity curable by marriage.” 
― Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

“The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him.” 
― Cher

“To be fully seen by somebody, then, and be loved anyhow - this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.” 
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage

“Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.” 
― Albert Einstein

“Aim high, but do not aim so high that you totally miss the target. What really matters is that he will love you, that he will respect you, that he will honor you, that he will be absolutely true to you, that he will give you the freedom of expression and let you fly in the development of your own talents. He is not going to be perfect, but if he is kind and thoughtful, if he knows how to work and earn a living, if he is honest and full of faith, the chances are you will not go wrong, that you will be immensely happy.” 
― Gordon B. Hinckley

“I don't want to be married just to be married. I can't think of anything lonelier than spending the rest of my life with someone I can't talk to, or worse, someone I can't be silent with.” 
― Mary Ann Shaffer, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

“Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.” 
― Katharine Hepburn

“Why does a woman work ten years to change a man, then complain he's not the man she married?” 
― Barbra Streisand

“No woman wants to be in submission to a man who isn't in submission to God!” 
― T.D. Jakes

“Someone told me the delightful story of the crusader who put a chastity belt on his wife and gave the key to his best friend for safekeeping, in case of his death. He had ridden only a few miles away when his friend, riding hard, caught up with him, saying 'You gave me the wrong key!” 
― Anaïs Nin

“Here's something else to think about: calling when you say you're going to is the very first brick in the house you are building of love and trust. If he can't lay this one stupid brick down, you ain't never gonna have a house baby, and it's cold outside.” 
― Greg Behrendt, He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys

I Love Him So!

My husband and I are the proud owners of an 8 month old Doberman called Ace that we’ve had since he was about 12 weeks old.  Ace is like family and most of the time I would rather spend time in bed hearing him at my bedroom window than spend time with most of the people that I know.

He loves me no matter what...if I am having a bad day or good day, if I am stressed or not, if I am well or sick... He is like my baby who will never grow up. J I would NEVER say having a dog is the same as having a child or children. It’s not. I would also never say being a parent is easy. I respect parents so much. But, personally, I feel there are definitely *similarities between having a child and having a dog. Loving, responsible pet owners absolutely go through “child-like” experiences with their animals.

The unconditional love from my dog melts my heart; the way he wags his tail (or tries to wag his tail as his was docked off soon after birth) when he sees me; the way he licks my hands and feet and climbs all over me, the way he jumps up to my bedroom window when he hears I’m in and pushes his face through the railings to be petted; the way he completely ignores my screams to ‘Stop it” (whatever it is); the way I worry when his barking seems a little bit different at night; the way my heart bleeds when he is being spanked even though I know he kinda deserves it …………He keeps me up at night with his racket but when I look into his brown eyes in the morning I seem to forget how upset I was the night before.

The only downside to having Ace is the constant little disagreement between my husband I as to how we want him to be brought up, as a fierce guard dog or as a loyal family pet. I’m delighted to say that nature seems to be winning over nurture and Ace is just a loveable rogue who’d rather play and be petted than to guard. And it is through no doing of mine, I swear! J

I Love This!!!!

Many Facebookers need to read this but I don't want to offend my 'aunties' on facebook so it is not going on there ... yet

Dear Diary,

I will be 33 next month and I am quite concerned that my life is not quite what I woulda wished it to be at this grand old age. Truth is I don't even know how I woulda wished it to be; I just know that it is what my primary school teacher will rate as 'Not Satisfactory'.

It is not mere coincidence that I have taken the plunge and resigned from work without a job; i have done it before but this time round I'm in no hurry to dive into another job where I will have to care about the needs of a boss and others.

I have decided to:

• really wait for the right job that ticks MY boxes.
• I have decided to start my own business which has been work in progress for a while but I need to get off the ground
• I have decided to take a break from life (no, wait, I am not suicidal, not full-blown,I am too puny for that) for the rest of this year
• I have decided to be selfish for a month and just laze out and vegetate at home, watch trashy housewife daytime tv, eat ice-cream and pretend to be a rich housewife who lunches and visits her dressmaker every week

Life is going on, 40 is rushing towards me at full throttle. In my head I am still 25! My body with its battle scars says otherwise but in my mind I will always be that 25 year old who had finished her 1st degree and was  trying out life, living on her own alone in a town thousands of miles from her mama. I was trying to figure out relationships. I was cheating and being cheated on. I was getting tired of eating fried egg and oven baked chips and trying to properly cook something apart from jollof for myself. I think I shouldn't have because I was able to lose sooo much weight on fried eggs and oven-baked chips.

I was pretending to work and save money for grad school even though I spent all my money on cheap clothing and accessories and being lured by the gadgets sold on the home shopping tv channels. I lived day by day without much planning. I just cared about making the rent and paying for my electric, water and grocery. I was enjoying going to the cinema alone in the afternoons.

My life for a while now has been just too damn grown-up and I need a break ... for a while ....... until the husband starts getting worried. Maybe I will be able to instill some discipline into my dog so he will respect and obey me like he does the Pack Leader (I've been watching too much Dog Whisperer :-))

This November and December are going to be my 'slowest' months yet and I am looking forward to that. In the mean time, charity donations are welcome to feed my clothing and ice cream addictions. Thank You!!